Thursday, July 08, 2004
Winfield is coming HOME!
On April 20, 2003, my brother, Winfield, was deployed to Baghdad, Iraq. With tears and frustration in my family’s hearts, we said goodbye and resolved ourselves to a life of prayer and faith. Even with my dad’s extensive military background, none of us were prepared for what the next year and a half would bring.
My brother was placed in charge of over a hundred men. It was his job to order supplies, keep team morale alive and to patrol the streets of Iraq, in a sometimes failed effort to keep the peace. He has had friends die, roommates die, and he has seen things that no one in my family will ever know about. Because of his incredible work ethic and ability to see projects through to their bitter end, he was promoted twice while there and even netted himself a Bronze Star.
The phone calls home were infrequent. Most often my parents would hear from Winfield on a weekly basis. Since he was only allowed 40 minutes a week on the phone, he would spend 20 minutes with his girlfriend and try to alternate the other 20 minutes between my parents and myself. Once in a while I would receive a letter or an email from him, but more often than not, we have relied heavily on CNN and prayer.
But now, after a 3 month long extension, he is finally in Kuwait out-processing.
My brother called me on my birthday to let me know that he was definitely coming home. I was with Paul at the time, shopping in SoHo. I immediately collapsed into the doorway of a nearby store and just cried and cried. They were tears of joy, tears of exhaustion, and tears of frustration. But could it be over? Could he be finally coming home?
On Tuesday morning, my brother called me to let me know that his return home had been pushed off again. With my parents on vacation, it was up to me to call them and let them know that this may not be happening anymore. For the last two days, I’ve walked around pretty angry and upset. It’s been 15 long months and he was told that he’d be there longer??
But this morning, I talked to my parents and it’s confirmed. Winfield will arrive in NYC on July 26th. He will have two weeks here with us before he has to head back to Germany to fulfill his last obligatory year with the United States military.
It’s hard to explain how I’ve been feeling over the last year. I think it’s suffice to say that I’ve shed buckets of tears, worn away my insides with worry, and pretty much lost hope that I’d ever see my brother alive again. We’ve missed birthdays and Christmas and Thanksgiving. He hasn’t seen a single show I’ve done in NYC and I have yet to meet the girl he has been dating for the last two years. There have been memories that I’ve had to make without him and laughs that I’ve had to share with him from thousands of miles away.
But now, I can finally relax. My brother is coming home to be with his family. He is safe. He is healthy. He is ready. I’ve never known anyone that has gone through such a difficult challenge and come out on top. He has looked death in its ugly eyes and found the will and the strength to survive it.
Not only is my little brother my best friend, he is my hero.
Sure, we could sit here for hours and debate the worthiness of the Iraqi war. We could discuss the actions of George Bush and we could argue the rights and wrongs of all of his decisions. But at this point, I just don’t care anymore. Winfield CuttheShit is out of Iraq and coming home. There isn’t a need for me to analyze this shit anymore. And there isn’t a reason for me to continue being angry.
This last year of my life has been (by far) the worst. With the grace of God, I have been able to keep my head up, despite all of the sadness and fear that has been coursing in my veins. The tears that I shed now will be out of relief.
I will never stop supporting our troops and I will never forget those men and women that are still stuck in the hell hole that is Iraq. My prayers will not stop. They will only change to fit the circumstances. If anything, I’ve certainly learned the reality of being a loved one that is left behind during a time of war. It hurts and it’s scary and I will never ever stop supporting our country and its troops. No matter how difficult it may be.
Thank you to everyone who has stood by me over the last year. Your constant prayers and emails and well wishes were exactly what I needed to get through this last year of my life. If there was a way for me to show you how deeply grateful I am, I would. But you’ll just have to take my word for it. But I can say thank you again, so THANKS TO YOU!
I’m off to a wedding this weekend. I won’t be back until Tuesday. Until then, feel free to entertain yourselves. Or re-read this post over and over so you can actually get a glimpse of how overwhelmed with happiness that I am.
My brother is coming home!
On April 20, 2003, my brother, Winfield, was deployed to Baghdad, Iraq. With tears and frustration in my family’s hearts, we said goodbye and resolved ourselves to a life of prayer and faith. Even with my dad’s extensive military background, none of us were prepared for what the next year and a half would bring.
My brother was placed in charge of over a hundred men. It was his job to order supplies, keep team morale alive and to patrol the streets of Iraq, in a sometimes failed effort to keep the peace. He has had friends die, roommates die, and he has seen things that no one in my family will ever know about. Because of his incredible work ethic and ability to see projects through to their bitter end, he was promoted twice while there and even netted himself a Bronze Star.
The phone calls home were infrequent. Most often my parents would hear from Winfield on a weekly basis. Since he was only allowed 40 minutes a week on the phone, he would spend 20 minutes with his girlfriend and try to alternate the other 20 minutes between my parents and myself. Once in a while I would receive a letter or an email from him, but more often than not, we have relied heavily on CNN and prayer.
But now, after a 3 month long extension, he is finally in Kuwait out-processing.
My brother called me on my birthday to let me know that he was definitely coming home. I was with Paul at the time, shopping in SoHo. I immediately collapsed into the doorway of a nearby store and just cried and cried. They were tears of joy, tears of exhaustion, and tears of frustration. But could it be over? Could he be finally coming home?
On Tuesday morning, my brother called me to let me know that his return home had been pushed off again. With my parents on vacation, it was up to me to call them and let them know that this may not be happening anymore. For the last two days, I’ve walked around pretty angry and upset. It’s been 15 long months and he was told that he’d be there longer??
But this morning, I talked to my parents and it’s confirmed. Winfield will arrive in NYC on July 26th. He will have two weeks here with us before he has to head back to Germany to fulfill his last obligatory year with the United States military.
It’s hard to explain how I’ve been feeling over the last year. I think it’s suffice to say that I’ve shed buckets of tears, worn away my insides with worry, and pretty much lost hope that I’d ever see my brother alive again. We’ve missed birthdays and Christmas and Thanksgiving. He hasn’t seen a single show I’ve done in NYC and I have yet to meet the girl he has been dating for the last two years. There have been memories that I’ve had to make without him and laughs that I’ve had to share with him from thousands of miles away.
But now, I can finally relax. My brother is coming home to be with his family. He is safe. He is healthy. He is ready. I’ve never known anyone that has gone through such a difficult challenge and come out on top. He has looked death in its ugly eyes and found the will and the strength to survive it.
Not only is my little brother my best friend, he is my hero.
Sure, we could sit here for hours and debate the worthiness of the Iraqi war. We could discuss the actions of George Bush and we could argue the rights and wrongs of all of his decisions. But at this point, I just don’t care anymore. Winfield CuttheShit is out of Iraq and coming home. There isn’t a need for me to analyze this shit anymore. And there isn’t a reason for me to continue being angry.
This last year of my life has been (by far) the worst. With the grace of God, I have been able to keep my head up, despite all of the sadness and fear that has been coursing in my veins. The tears that I shed now will be out of relief.
I will never stop supporting our troops and I will never forget those men and women that are still stuck in the hell hole that is Iraq. My prayers will not stop. They will only change to fit the circumstances. If anything, I’ve certainly learned the reality of being a loved one that is left behind during a time of war. It hurts and it’s scary and I will never ever stop supporting our country and its troops. No matter how difficult it may be.
Thank you to everyone who has stood by me over the last year. Your constant prayers and emails and well wishes were exactly what I needed to get through this last year of my life. If there was a way for me to show you how deeply grateful I am, I would. But you’ll just have to take my word for it. But I can say thank you again, so THANKS TO YOU!
I’m off to a wedding this weekend. I won’t be back until Tuesday. Until then, feel free to entertain yourselves. Or re-read this post over and over so you can actually get a glimpse of how overwhelmed with happiness that I am.
My brother is coming home!
